58 Comments
Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

My two kids still at home eat alllllmost anything. Except potatoes. Alas. The one at college eats potatoes, but not tacos. How can one not love potatoes and tacos?

In other news, my teen son rated me 6/10 this week, which I think translates to three out of five stars. I'm making a T-shirt with Three Star Parent on the front and Yelp style reviews on the back. "Too many rules!" "Your music is too loud!" A giant eye rolling emoji. But I need more suggestions for the reviews and thought perhaps I could speed up the process by crowd sourcing them here. What makes YOU a three star parent?

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author

omg ha ha ha 6/10 SO MID

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My kids called me a dream crusher when I had the tiniest question about their desired future lives.

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

I chat with their friends and ask questions.

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

"Forces me to bring a coat when it's 15 degrees outside!"

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

“Talks too loud” “Too chatty with sales clerks”

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

My 16 year old would say "asks too many questions" and "thinks wet towels on floors are tragic."

He doesn't like anyone to touch his back (he's a great hugger but GOD FORBID you pat his back as you pass him in the kitchen). But I think the accusation "back toucher" would be unique to him.

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"got in pool" "wouldn't let me have a third sprite" "said good morning too loud" (these are just today's reviews)

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Thanks for these suggestions. I am enjoying Sandwich so much and want to read it for the rest of my life. This Substack may be an adequate replacement 😀

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author

ahhh, thank you!

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Not me reading the potato salad like erotica ("I sometimes add pepperoncini"--yeah you do. Tell. Me. Again. About. The. Dill. Stem. Workaround) and CRYING IN PERCALE. Tiny bb boy child leaves for sophomore year tmw and I AM FINE. Xooo

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author

ha ha ha ha

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I’m beyond pumped to find the recipe for the potato salad from your book! I read Sandwich in two gloriously mild and sunny days on the back porch of our cabin in the woods. I never wanted it to end. Maybe a sequel set in five years? Check back in on the family? 🤞🏻

I have to share that my daughter is hyping your book to every woman we meet. 😂 She’s 11 and keeps a little list of authors and poets I like. Her dad takes her to our independent bookstore (Malaprops in Asheville or Highland Books in Brevard, NC) before holidays/my birthday where she hands the list off to the extremely helpful staff and asks for help finding something new I might enjoy. After I tore through SANDWICH and came inside wiping my eyes at the end, she now asks every woman we know/meet if they’ve read the book. If they haven’t, she tells them your name and demands they read it- “It’s a lovely book about menopause and children growing up and parents getting older and everyone still loving each other. It made my mom cry, but I also heard her laughing a lot while she read it.”

Anyway….if you ever consider doing a book reading or something down this way, you have a lot of fans here and an incredible hype woman. 😂

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Catherine, you are the best. Thank you for all the beautiful parentheticalness! And this is not the last you've heard from me so long as that potato salad is in my future. Way more excited to make that than anything in my new cookbook right now. Is that weird? Don't tell my publicist.

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author

Ha ha ha! <3

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Why does the long hall feel like an actual chamber of my heart? 🥲

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Ah! I JUST last week made makeup wipes out of old cotton … diapers! They are stained and full of holes, but I traced circles and cut them out and did a blanket stitch around the edges. My kids thought it was very silly, but if those cloth diapers were good enough for like five years of sweet little baby butts all told, they’re good enough for my 40-something face, right?

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author

Ha ha ha! SO GOOD! I should have clarified (and now have) that mine are made to be deliciously, naughtily disposible.

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"Naughtily disposible." I love it. Also, I think it's probably less naughty to use scraps of shirt that would end up in a landfill, anyway, than buying new disposable products!

Ooh! Does cotton cloth compost? Are there any soil scientists in the room?

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I'm not a soil scientist, but I am a fanatic composter, and I say yes! If it's pure cotton, it can be composted, especially in this smaller size. We have industrial composting through the city, and I'm not quite as sure about home composting, but cotton is a natural fiber so it should break down.

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

I love the makeup wipe idea. When our kids were younger, we used cut up T-shirts to wipe snotty noses. When our son was eight, he was astonished to see Boogie Wipes at the store. He couldn’t believe people would pay for them. Although he also said “it’s cheaper and easier to just eat your boogers. Don’t they know that?”

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Thank you so much for sharing your life and yourself! Reading your Substack and your books always boosts my spirit and gives me such joy!!

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Ugh my baby boy just went to college, and I helped him make his bed (it's lofted! I'm not getting up there!) and it felt like exactly the right thing to do. He did appreciate the mattress pad but I think it was just to make me feel better, which is okay with me.

He's only 30 minutes away while my other kid is 15 hours away and graduating this year, but it was the same amount of sad dropping him off.

But neither of them would like that potato salad so I will make it! Empty nest is so weird!

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author

UGH. Sending hugs, Beth.

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Aug 29Liked by Catherine Newman

I am going to make the make-up wipes out my beloved college-bound children's beloved too-small t-shirts.

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author

Do it! I don't wash and reuse these. Just full disclosure.

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

I love to see that I’m not the only one who puts contacts in my phone as “ Susie- Stella’s mum” . My daughter recently asked me why & I said so I don’t get people mixed up!

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author

Exactly!

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Dropped my oldest off at about college two weeks ago with the same heaviness in my heart; I knew it would be hard, but I was unprepared for the amount of tears shed the weeks before, the day of drop off, and thereafter. At least she has mentioned how comfy her bed is (4 inch mattress topper!) and has fortunately called me most days. <3

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author

SOB. It gets easier, it really does. Eventually.

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At least she is happy when she calls and sleeping soundly and night!

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

From the gloomy hallway files: my daughter just arrived in Berlin for study abroad and sent me a picture from her building captioned "hallway of weirdness." I wish I could paste it here. The walls are painted such a dark purple, I thought they were black. But the carpet's beige so that's cheery!

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author

Yikes!

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Been devouring zucchini, wanting some mascara removing device so thanks for these. Also: Did all our moms use Clinique??

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

I'm going to go with yes? I am nearly 50 and my mom JUST gave me some "take off the day" and moisture surge that she wasn't using. I don't use them but it was impossible to refuse.

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

I find this heartwarming and comforting. I'm glad you took it!

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

I know people (especially people's moms, I assume) are loyal to their brands, but...tell her the Trader Joe's Lightweight Gel Moisturizer is a total dupe of the Clinique moisture surge stuff, and for a fraction of the price.

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

Good to know! She adores Trader Joe's, so she'll probably love that. I honestly don't know if she still uses it; she just can't resist Bonus Time.

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author

good to know!

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My mom was (and probably still is) a Clinique devoteé…I used to get the “nice” bags (and ugly lipstick shades) from all of the Clinique Bonuses!

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author

My 87-year-old mom STILL saves these for me! I have so many little jars and tubes of things. So many little zipper bags with 3 tampons in them that I don't use.

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Little zipper bags with tampons - exactly! Earlier this week, as I helped my daughter move-in to her freshman dorm, I noticed that she had packed some of those little zipper bags from Clinique bonuses (maybe Trina Turk?) with tampons in them…quite a stylish way to carry the necessities, right???

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Aug 28Liked by Catherine Newman

These days I get sample bags from Clarins. Maybe Clinique was the first affordable fancy brand of face treatments.

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Aug 29Liked by Catherine Newman

Are you then washing the wiperators or just tossing them?

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author

I'm so glad you asked this. I just added a note that I TOSS THEM!!!!

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